She isn't afraid

At the beginning of summer, we moved the girls' playroom to the screened-in front porch. The other day, I got Scully to put batteries in the mini keyboard/all-in-one musical instrument. For days on end, I'd been hearing faint classical music but couldn't tell where it was coming from.

Then, Scully pointed out that it was the keyboard on the porch going off due to some kind of "short". I tried to accept that but it didn't feel right. My little daughter, almost 17 months old now, says 'hi' to people and only to people. She'd been saying 'hi' every once in a while throughout the house for the past day or so. Strange, but nothing of great importance.

It got to the point that I couldn't take the classical music anymore playing at all times of the day and night, so I removed the batteries yesterday and then went inside to get a Freezie for the baby.

She grabbed the Freezie, walked straight over to the porch, walked out and said 'hi' in the direction of the keyboards. Then, she held her Freezie up proudly to show someone in the same area.

I told Scully who admitted it was a bit "freaky". The poor guy. Living with three sensitive females must be hard.
Whoever it is, it's her ghost because I get only the faintest impressions.

It reminds me of Gigi who, at 18 months, used to run over to the potting shed in the backyard looking for "Ollie".

Remains of the Dead





The first in the Ghost Dusters mystery series by Wendy Roberts, The Remains of the Dead is a quick read. Despite the fact that it addresses serious matters, it manages to be light and entertaining.

Sadie, our protagonist, has an unusual business and a habit that she manages to conceal from most people: she regularly speaks to the dead. We learn more about her relationships with others -- living and dead -- than we do about her at this point in the series. For example, it may have completely escaped my attention but I had no clear idea of her age.

Surprisingly, I was more impressed by the dialogue between the living and the dead -- and by the subplots -- than I was by the plot itself. Not that it does not work, but the dialogue between Sadie and her ghosts stole the show, so to speak.

It has not ceased to amaze me that there are at least as many characterizations of ghosts and their relationships to the living as there are books that I've read in which ghosts (forgive me) appear. This book is no exception.

If you read this book, do so because it is not very densely populated with questions about souls, the afterlife and what it all means. It adheres to the rules of genre mystery writing and it has a twist. It also conveys a unique perspective on communication with the dead, an original one in my experience.

What boy?!

This evening, I confess that I couldn't wait to get the children to bed. With Scully being away on business, I'm tired. So, after putting Gigi to bed, I was done and reclining (or, refusing to move, if you prefer). The house was mostly silent except for the sound of the fan in the baby's unused nursery.

But I could hear a soft conversation (with laughter) between two children and I just passed it off as the product of sleep deprivation or a simple error in perception.

Later on, I did actually move and went to check on the children. Baby was asleep and Gigi was, too. Just as I was leaving, Gigi woke up and lifted her head, squinting:

"Mum, where did the boy go?"

I couldn't get her to say anything else. Five-year-olds are surprisingly protective of their sleep. At least, mine is. I must make a mental note to ask her tomorrow to please elaborate. These days, however, I often get a sigh as if talking to me is a real chore; well, at least as if I'm not as interesting as Arthur and D.W.

Again with the door!

On Sunday night, I fell asleep at the same time as the girls did. At some point, I could hear the phone ringing downstairs. I decided not to answer it, feeling too tired. Besides, who calls a house with children so late at night? But the phone was persistent.

Then, the doorbell rang. I checked the time: about 10 p.m. I thought, "There's no way I'm going down there to answer that!" But, again, it persisted. Searching frantically for something to preserve my modesty, I grabbed my maternity hospital gown (er, it accidentally ended up in my suitcase last year) and ran downstairs.

I called through the door, "Who is it?"

"It's security, ma'am," a man answered back. "Are you alright?"

Ugh. He called me 'ma'am'.

"Yes, I'm OK." I opened the door just a little. How did I know if he was really a security guard from my security company?

"ALARM COMPANY has detected an intrusion alert. We need to know if you're OK."

That's when I noticed it: the absence of an alarm. That thing is so !#$@@ noisy, I would have heard it down the street.

"If you check Zone 102, you'll see the door's open."

I looked over and, surely enough, it was open. But I had locked it!

"Must have been the wind or something," he offered.

"Yeh," I said. "The wind." Except: I wouldn't have been able to secure the house if the door was insecure enough to have blown open in the wind. When the door is shut -- but not locked -- it is impossible to push it open.

A report was filled out. The security guard had checked the entire property, inside and under my car as well. He went room-by-room, door-by-door through the entire house. The only other people in here with me, he concluded, were two sleeping children.

I was a bit shaken. There were no signs of attempted break-in. Scully, being in the UK on business, was going to have a hard time believing this.

I waited until I knew he'd be awake before calling.

"What??@!" He yelled down the phone. "Obviously, you DIDN'T lock it. That's the only reasonable explanation."

"But I DID lock it. I went around the entire house locking up. You're telling me to convince myself that I didn't do something I can remember clearly doing. THAT'S insane," I countered.

He had to agree. But, why hadn't the alarm sounded? That's when he realized it wasn't an error on my part. The alarm had been set but had not gone off. I couldn't have set the alarm if the door hadn't been shut and it has been clearly established that one cannot push the door open when it's shut-but-not-locked. Ha!

I have to admit, before going to sleep, I had asked my spirit guides and relatives watching over us to give me a sign that they were with us because I couldn't see or detect them.

Ridding My Home of Books

Scully has asked me to kindly go through our 10,000 books and, well, get rid of some that I don't want or won't read or won't read again, etc.

Fair enough. We either need to get a bigger house or pare down our collection. I've definitely set some boundaries. There are books with which I will never part; books that are no longer in print or books that had such a limited print run that you can barely find them on the Internet.

I'm thinking of old Hans Holzer, Ed & Lorraine Newman, Edgar Cayce tomes . . . To mention only a few among hundreds of names. Over the years, I've tried different book databases and different methods of tracking my acquisitions but, really, haven't succeeded very well. I think I will use this blog to help keep me organized. Why not? I'm working on a running list of titles in the area of supernatural/paranormal/psychic phenomena and will post a link.

I'm reminded of the first time that we (my family-of-origin and I) walked through our new home in the early 1980s. As I kind of 'spaced out' looking around, taking everything in, I heard my mother mentioning to someone that many families had lived in the house but most had left pretty quickly.

I opened the closet door of the upstairs hallway. There, on the shelf, was a copy of the bible. Had people been afraid? Was this an age-old custom of moving home? And, now I wonder, did I keep the bible?

Dear Ghostiegurl:

I have a home that a man died in and he and his wife were in the middle of a divorce. They would fight all the time. He died in this house of a heart attack. I have seen the man here and often feel his presence. When my husband comes home we fight always and we try to be close. You can feel a very cold presence in the room, yet if we quit and walk into another room, it is usually warm. Any sugggestions???



Answer:

Many psychics believe that ghosts leave visual or emotional "imprints" (it's like watching a film over and over again or feeling a certain emotion in a certain room) on the places in which they lived or spent time in. It's possible that you and your husband can pick up the tension in the room in which you and he argue because the deceased man and his wife used to argue there.

If it is an imprint, you're not dealing with a ghost. But, you say that you have seen him. If it isn't an imprint, and you are picking up the attitude of the ghost, then you may ask him to leave. Tell him that he doesn't have to stay there anymore or, that if he does stay, ask him to leave rooms when you enter and you can "share" the house in peace.

Reaping

I came up with a description of my status: I'm now a professional 'psychic on leave of absence', though I can still be convinced to give a reading every now and then. I still hear from regular clients who like to give me updates, tell me they look forward to my returning to work. A local group asked me if they could keep me in mind for future investigations (some televised, some not) and I agreed.

Anyway, I decided to watch a movie while reaping the benefits of cardiovascular exercise. At the gym, I sat transfixed as The Reaping played on my Treo. It made going to resistance level 8 for four minutes, three times a lot easier; it made me work harder during the four four-minute "rest" intervals.

I didn't get to finish it. The pre-programmed weightloss workout (if you're not doing the math) is only 28 minutes long. I'm hoping to finish it at the next two gym sessions!

What do I think about it? It's definitely creepy. Gabriel Byrne is always worth watching. I'm not religious but I often find myself watching scary movies with religious themes (think: The Omen, The Exorcist) and really enjoying them. I can't say much about The Reaping because I haven't seen much.

Carrying on the theme of psychic kids:

As a child -- about the age of Gigi -- I had a knack for always knowing where anything was located within the house. My mother would say, "Have you seen this ----?" and I have one particular memory of opening a bottom cupboard in the kitchen and reaching around behind the pipes to show my mother where an object was. She found the frequency of this kind of event peculiar.

My sister -- whose abilities are more dream-oriented than outright intuition -- complained often about playing games with me, especially the card game, Go Fish. I always "just knew" what she had as a hand. She STILL talks about it from time to time as being a particular point of frustration while we were growing up.

As far as empathy goes, as a child, I would walk past people and get overwhelmed with an emotion of some great intensity, as if it was just washing over me and I could barely stand up under the pressure or weight of it. The hardest emotion, of course, being sorrow or grief. It wasn't easy and I would really dread having to walk past people at a very young age!

So many psychic things happened to me as a child; would I have wanted to "go public" with it on a show such as Psychic Kids? I doubt it. I doubt that my mother, as open-minded as she is about such things, would have allowed it.

Gigi always knows who is calling and often tells us who is coming by. As you probably already know, she's been talking about ghosts since she started talking! After much thought, I realize that I would not allow her or my other child to participate in such a show.

At any rate, if you, dear readers, would like me to post about something in particular, please feel free to ask as I work harder to keep this blog updated more frequently. Otherwise, I'll just keep rambling on as usual . . .

Psychic Kids

This show surprised me. I managed to catch one episode and, so far, I am of two minds about the program.

On the one hand, I'm glad that the psychic sensitivity of children is finally getting some attention. On the other, I'm uncomfortable with children being subjected to such intense media exposure when, clearly, in my opinion, they are not old enough to appreciate the later-in-life consequences of being so open. Certainly, it's entertaining; however, children can learn to be comfortable with themselves without doing so in front of a camera.

But, then again, according to the bio of Dr. Lisa Miller (co-host and psychologist), she works with "psychic kids and their parents to offer support and to clear a path for psychic children in our culture." I can support this idea. Perhaps the later-in-life consequences will be negligible since our culture does seem to be developing an open-mindedness where the paranormal is concerned.

Who knows? Maybe one day, people will put a capital "P" on their blogs or Facebook profiles to indicate that they're "out" as a psychic and proud of it.

Interestingly enough, my sister and I hadn't spoken for a while and today she asked: "Have you seen 'Psychic Kids'? I watched my first episode last night.

At any rate, it makes for capitivating television.

Dead Television Shows

Dead Like Me lasted only two seasons but it was fantastic. It was created by Bryan Fuller (think Wonderfalls, Heroes, Pushing Daisies, Star Trek: Voyager.)

George, the main character, having been killed in a freak accident, steps out of her body to find that she is, well, that she still IS. She has no choice but to live her dead-life as it becomes pretty ordinary but utterly fascinating.

I've noticed re-runs and you could probably catch an episode pretty easily. Otherwise, both seasons were released on DVD and they are well worth the purchase.

The humour is dry, biting; its timing is impeccable.

Fear and Folklore

Over the past year, until March, I was addicted to the first season of Ghost Whisperer though I hadn't seen an episode until after I'd stopped giving readings. Scully bought me the DVDs. My experiences do not match those of the main character, Melinda, and I think that is why I enjoyed it. Unfortunately, the tone of the second season changed and it wasn't interesting to me at that point.

I haven't seen the other shows that involve the paranormal and don't really know their titles. I guess I've always been put off by the fact that televisionland perpetuates certain ideas of the supernatural that I simply have not experienced myself. Also, in the many hundreds of readings that I've done, not a single person had been hurt by a ghost nor knew of anyone who had been but almost everyone feared ghosts and believed that a "haunting" was something that had to be erradicated.

So, in my last post, when I spoke of "folklore-ish" aspects of ghost-filled movies, it is this to which I was referring. It's one thing to enjoy these movies (I loved Poltergeist) and television shows about the paranormal; it is quite another thing to be frightened of the paranormal because of such movies and shows.

Don't get me wrong: I still find some experiences unsettling but it is not due to a fear of harm. At night, when the toys start playing music and wake me up or when books defy gravity by falling and then resting on shelves at impossible angles, my heart starts racing until I've processed that something is happening. To me, the paranormal is very normal, just sometimes unexpected!

Room 1408, please, with a view . . .



It took about a dozen attempts to watch the movie because, as you can (barely) see at the bottom of the image, my baby was with me and I could only watch the non-scary, mundane parts when she was around. I'm not sure how much information children retain at that age but I didn't want to take any chances. I was experimenting with the sepia-tone filter that day, too.

The movie was enjoyable even though it played to all the folklore-ish ideas about the supernatural and ghosts. But if you remember the lost-in-television, braces-going-wild drama of Poltergeist (1982) and would still watch it again, then you appreciate the folklore-ish aspect of things and should probably watch this film.

I have to say that I love Samuel Jackson and I think John Cusack is always brilliant.

Rambling

I have so many -- more than a hundred -- questions from readers that have gone unanswered because I have been so busy. My older daughter has started summer vacation; my baby has just started walking. If I finish one cup of coffee in a day, I'm doing well. There really aren't enough hours in a day to do everything I want/need to do, but, I'm sure that everyone reading this can relate. After supper, I go to my second job: the 'health club' (which, as far as I can tell, is just a way of saying 'very expensive gym'). Ghostiegurl is trying to shed the pounds and generally get healthier.

The premonitions that I had years ago about my future featured myself as a heavy woman. I still have to try, though; sometimes, we seem to be able to change the outcome of things provided that we don't suddenly find ourselves living out the premonition. That has been my experience. But, it's difficult. I can't tell you the number of times that I've been in the midst of events when I've realized, "Oh, s*&@! I dreamt about this . . ." I don't have all -- or maybe any -- of the answers. Maybe there are things we simply can't change.

Sometimes, a predictive dream is really straightforward in its interpretation: such an event X will happen at point Y in time involving person A. At other times, the dreams feature a mixture of all the predictive elements but the setting is purely unrealistic. For example, after breaking up with a boyfriend, I dreamt of having two children and a husband and of living in a small town and receiving a message from my ex-boyfriend. Well, it happened recently. I was shocked to receive an email after 15 years of silence just a couple of months ago but all the elements had been in place. I call that a "comfort dream": though inconsolable at the time of the separation, my mind was telling me that I would hear from him again and placed the future communication in a broad context.

We'll have to see about the dreams in which I was heavy. It's hard to imagine because my hair -- very long with loads of spiral curls -- was short in the dreams and Scully hates the idea of me cutting my hair. I don't even feel inclined to do it.

At any rate, back to busy-ness. Giving up readings was hard to do but, in my schedule, something had to give. There's definitely a part of me that misses giving readings. The other evening, a friend requested that I give her one and I did. Believe it or not, my husband (aka 'Scully') occasionally asks for a reading. I like giving readings. I will do so again at some point.

Not Gone But Maybe Forgotten!

It isn't really that things have been quiet around here for as long as my absence from the blog.

My house is periodically buzzing with ghost activity. Back in February, for example, every night for weeks, one or all of my baby's noise-making toys would be set off. One night, every single toy was blaring music across the hall from our bedroom in the nursery. One night, even I was freaked out and didn't get out of bed. Sometimes, the noise would come from Mini-me's room and she would come running out to tell me.

Just a few weeks ago, she told me about a man named "Cory" in her room who was looking for bad guys. He had a hard "green hat" and a gun and he was dirty. He also had a dog with him who helped him. When I asked if it frightened her, she said, "no" but she didn't think he would find any bad guys here. Then, just recently, I asked her if Cory was still around and she said that he had left to go to another family's house; in fact, to one of her friends' house, just to look after her for a while.

Premonitions are strong. But I've given up readings entirely because of the stress of childcare. I stopped after January, actually. I honestly had no clue before having the baby that trying to work inside the home as well as be a mother of two to very small children and work from home would be so difficult.

Lately, however, I've been able to read more often and I've come across some great titles that I intend to share at some point.

At any rate, I haven't disappeared. I guess I just needed a break.